My life, my family, my story

Hidup hidup uhh mau cerita nih, pusing akutuh hidupku ngeluh terus kapan majunya gitu. Lelah akutu sama diri aku sendiri,  gaul susah,  berteman susah,  sempet punya temen deket ga bertahan lama apalagi pacar heloo. Belum aja kenal udh overthinking kya org stress sendiri, ayolah kok aku gitu amat. Mana ada yang suka ke aku orang kaya aku,  masa laluku engga bagus buat diinget pokonya ceritanya agak kelam dan sekarang udh dikasih yang e enak masih aja segalanya dihubungin sama masa lalu. Toxic bgt ini pemikiran, pantes ga ada yang mau deketin org akunya gitu. Dan hal lainnya kepercayaan diri,  im not pretty or confident like other girls mereka yang ganti style tiap waktu percaya diri sama diri mereka dan aku engga ada upaya untuk kesana yang namanya gaul susah bgt ya harus bisa mengikuti trend baru orang2 bisa nerima kita,  face problem juga dari dulu aku kok gini ya,  perasaan ke dokter berobat udh hampir 5 kali tapi wajahku ini gampang banget jerawata...

My quarantine life is really boring,  I can't even breath fresh air with a lot of tasks such my kkn report (kkn means community service program)  pkl or internship and last task thesis. I got so many problems on my mind cause all just stuck in my head I can't even start it,  too lazy. I know I have nothing to do but when I start to think about those tasks my mind start exploding like a bomb and it's all become viruses on my head more dangerous than covid-19 virus.  My body isn't move, laying on bed,  my brain isn't thinking just watch some kind of videos. I don't know what motivates me, hmmm I'm too lazy. Is it because of my personality?  Plegmatis sangunis?  Love peace and it makes you more lazy to create yourself. Infp?  A lazy introvert,  B bloodtype it push you harder to be a lazer. Taurus? Just a while spirit,  moody person. But Taurus when they have a purpose they will reach it consistently but unfortunately I have purpose but need...